The Bucket List

Dear Friends,

Today I learned a little something about happiness. It was very unexpected but much welcomed. One thing I do for myself as often as I can is go to the movies. I love to enmesh myself in the world of make-believe and lose myself in the story of the movie. I often go with my friend Donna, and we both love to see movies that are thoughtful and about life lessons. After we have seen the movie, we often go for a coffee and discuss the content and lessons learned in detail. I just love to watch movies where I get to learn something new about myself and the world.

Tonight, I went with another group of people, and we saw the movie the Bucket List with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. I didn't know what to expect when I went in there, but I haven't been this pleasantly surprised about a movie in a very long time. This movie is basically about writing a bucket list, or a to do list of things you would like to do before you "kick the bucket." Many of us dream about bigger things, wanting to do more and be more before it is too late. For many, dreams stay just dreams. For others, dreams become reality. Many people, who receive a negative health message, end up changing their criteria for happiness and starting to live life differently. This movie was about just that. Getting a wake-up call and decide that some things need to change. But, what if we write our Bucket List before we receive that negative call? What if we write our To Do List now and decide to change things we are unhappy about now, this very moment? What would happen then? Well, of course, getting a wake-up call will often remind us about the things we have going for us and help us forget about the things that are not as important. I left this movie feeling touched, moved to tears, happy, excited, and peaceful at the same time. I had been reminded about how to be happy in spite of external things or lack thereof. At the end of the day, what I have is not important, it is who I have touched and who I have next to me that will let me know if I have lived a happy life. It is definitely a movie where you will get to learn to look at things in a new way. I left it feeling more alive than I have felt in a long time...

I actually started to think about this Life List even before I saw the movie tonight, and it was one of my clients who taught me this very valuable lesson (I always love to see my clients because I know I will learn so much from them :-)). It's been a while since I wrote on this blog, and I guess I have been looking for something to add to the topic of happiness. Like most people I have my ups and down, and lately I have felt like I haven't had much to share in that area. Although I feel like I experience happiness in different ways everyday by just looking at things in my life differently, I also have been looking for that "aha-moment." Or that feeling of...yes, I am truly happy now. The truth is that I haven't been able to find it. I have been feeling tired and gloomy. At times, I have been asking myself where my happiness went...

Then a couple of days ago, one of my clients told me how much I have helped her change her life into a positive direction, and how happy she was that she found me. This shifted my perspective totally, and it instantly reminded me of why I do what I do and why I am here on earth in the first place. It is not about my happiness at all or where I can find it, it is about the happiness I help bring to other people! The look on her face as she told me how much she enjoys her life now and all the things she now enjoys doing that she wouldn't do before. I remember the first time she stepped into my office. She was heartbroken and she had lost much of her hope of ever being happy. Now, after transforming her life, she is glowing and feeling empowered and very positive about future. This is what brings me the most authentic happiness of all. I felt as if something very dear to me (that I thought I had lost) suddenly came back and helped me open my eyes...

This experience, much like the movie did, kindly reminded me that happiness is not something I find in other things or something that I have to look for in other people or places. It is right here underneath my very nose every day waiting to be re-discovered, experienced, and moved through me, not by me.

Jenny

5 Questions to ask yourself about Happiness

1. What is happiness?
2. When are you experiencing happiness the most?
3. How do you know you are happy?
4. How can you tell when someone else is happy?
5. What are three things you can do each day to make other people happy?

Stay tuned for more questions and replies about happiness around the world...

Love,
Jenny

Happiness around the world

Being in the life coaching business, I often hear people talk about happiness and if they have it or not and how can they have more of it. This makes me wonder about this thing we call happiness and what it really is. I mean, when people say they are happy, what does it really mean? And how do they know they are happy? What is that one specific thing that makes them say, "I am happy?" And since happiness is a subjective experience, no two people can really experience the same kind of happiness, or can they? Is it possible to learn about happiness from other people and then model that in your own life, or is happiness something you either have or don't have?

When I was a little girl, I remember sitting in front of the tv and watching people smile and be happy in the movies. Back then I thought happiness was the same as having money or a comfortable lifestyle. And as I grew older and got a chance to experience life outside of the make-believe movie world, I found out that people who were rich weren't necessarily happy. And the people who didn't have a lot of financial stability could be the happiest people around. This brought my natural curiosity to life, and I started to reflect on the deeper questions of the universe. Questions such as why are we here and what is my ultimate purpose and mission in life? I knew even before I could comprehend it that I had a very specific reason for being on this earth, and I like to believe that we all have. The way I see it, in one way or another, we all want to be happy. We all want happiness. We may define it differently and have different ideas of what it is, but I believe that we ultimately want the same thing. To be loved and accepted for who we are...and to be happy. Happiness is like the end result we are all striving for, right? And if we all would experience more happiness, perhaps we would live in a very different world...

This brings me to another point. If we are all striving for happiness deep inside, how come there is not more of it? Happiness is best defined by each individual, but if we learn to look at life from a different perspective, perhaps we can find happiness in ALL our experiences...not just the ones that bring us joy. What then could be possible? Perhaps then we can believe that happiness really is all around the world and it is just a matter of starting to see it with another couple of eyes. We all encompase an amazing ability to envision, dream, and create whatever we desire in life. I strongly believe that all our creativity is born from that place of happiness. When we believe and feel empowered, happiness and love are present. My hope is that when we start seeing the happiness around us, we will start focusing on the things we WANT to create for ourselves versus the things we DON'T want to create. People who are happy and have a positive outlook on life naturally do this.

I saw a show the other day on tv. It was a tribute to the real life heroes of the world. Those heroes who have given of themselves selflessly to people in need. Those who have given up parts of their life in order to be of service to someone else. That show was so inspirational and powerful. Those who know me know that one of my biggest dreams is to go to third world countries and set up wellness centers and schools to the people in need. This show brought that dream back to life for me. I knew I still wanted to do it. I felt it so strong and clearly within me that it left no doubt. My dear friend and supporter, Donna, and I talked about ways for me to travel, meet other people, be of service to others, while doing what I love to do, and we came up with the idea of traveling and writing about people in remote parts of the world. Donna then suggested that I could do research and write about happiness around the world. Interview other people who live in other places about how they experience happiness. Donna and I both got so excited about this idea because it is really what I always wanted to do. It will be a perfect way to learn about other people's culture and lifestyle and model the lessons in a way so they contribute and enrich our lives for the better. This is a topic that is very dear to both Donna and I, and we immediately started to plan for the future and how to implement this fantastic opportunity. Now we are at the point of where I explain why this site has been created...

I am very happy to announce that I am starting a woldwide research project about happiness, and I need your help to do it. In the next couple of days, I will post a series of questions about happiness and how it is experienced around the world, and I would like to get your help to put it together. Being from Sweden, I highly encourage international input, and I would love to hear from anyone who has something to share about happiness. Just look for the posted questions about happiness at my blog site in the next couple of days, and share your point of view open heartedly. Please also include your name and your country so I can document your answers correctly. Thank you so much for helping to create awareness and spreading happiness around the world...

Jenny